Your Guide to Asking Someone to Be Your Bridesmaid

Alexia Marie Photo

Easily one of the best parts of getting engaged is spreading the news to your friends and family! And while calling, texting, FaceTiming, uploading ring pictures, and starting to plan your big day comes quickly after getting engaged, there’s one decision you should take just a little more time to make: choosing your bridesmaids and maid of honor. 

Choosing your bridesmaids and maid of honor is a super important decision when it comes to wedding planning. This “proposal” should occur anywhere between one year to about eight months prior to your wedding. 

“Proposing” to Your Bridesmaids 

There’s no one or right way to ask someone to be a bridesmaid in your wedding. While some brides-to-be prefer a more low-key proposal (i.e. a simple chat where you ask them in person), others prefer sending a creative gift or gift box in the mail. 

No matter what type of bridesmaid proposal you’re planning, there are several factors to consider before finalizing your “squad.” 

Don’t Ask Until You Know Your Wedding Date

It’s tempting to ask your bridesmaids as soon as you get engaged, but wait until you know your wedding date. This way, your bridesmaids will know whether they can commit or not! And try to be understanding if your wedding date doesn’t work for them - they may have a personal thing or a major life change going on at that time. 

Think On It 

While you probably already know who you want as your bridesmaids before you even get engaged, it should come with a lot of thought. If your wedding isn’t happening for another year or two, consider who you want by your side throughout that whole time. 

Give As Many Details as Possible 

Prior to finalizing your bridesmaids, try to nail down what kind of bridal shower and bachelorette party you’d like. That will help you determine how big your bridal party will be AND provide enough information for your bridesmaids so they aren’t left in the dark. 

Be Engaged for 60 Days (or More)

To avoid rushing into choosing your bridesmaids, allow yourself about 60-days to think about it. You can begin to plan the number of bridesmaids you want and what kind of gifts you’ll give them. 

Don’t Forget a Follow-Up Conversation 

While it’s exciting to be asked to be a bridesmaid, it’s common to feel stressed about what’s expected. Within a few weeks of asking, meet with each of your bridesmaids separately to discuss your vision and ensure they understand their role and responsibilities in the wedding. Having everyone on the same page will keep things running smoothly and stress-free!