Your Guide to Having Kids at Your Wedding

Deciding whether to include children in your wedding festivities is a personal choice, and there's no one-size-fits-all answer. Some couples envision adorable flower girls and ring bearers adding charm to their ceremony, while others prefer an adults-only affair to maintain a certain ambiance. Both choices are valid; the key is to make a decision early and communicate it clearly to your guests. 

Invitations: Clarity is Kindness

When it comes to invitations, specificity is your friend. If children are invited, include their names on the invitation. For example, "Mr. and Mrs. Smith and Emily" indicates that Emily is welcome. If you're opting for an adults-only event, address the invitation solely to the parents. Avoid ambiguous phrases like "and family," which can lead to confusion.

The Personal Touch

Beyond the written word, a personal phone call can go a long way in conveying your wishes. If you're not inviting children, a courteous conversation allows you to explain your reasons and address any concerns. This approach demonstrates thoughtfulness and helps prevent misunderstandings.​

Selective Inclusion: Navigating the Gray Areas

If you choose to include some children but not others, consistency is crucial. One approach is to invite only immediate family members' children or set an age cutoff. For instance, including children over the age of 10 may be more manageable, as they're typically better equipped to handle the formalities of a wedding. Remember, the more children present, the more their behavior can influence the event's atmosphere.​

Roles for the Little Ones

Involving children in your ceremony can be heartwarming. Traditionally, flower girls and ring bearers are between 3 and 7 years old. Older children might serve as junior bridesmaids or groomsmen, ushers, or program distributors. Assign roles that align with each child's personality to ensure they feel comfortable and confident.​

Catering to Young Palates

If children are attending, consider offering kid-friendly meal options. Simple, familiar foods can keep young guests satisfied and prevent potential messes. For teenagers, consult with their parents to determine if they prefer adult menu selections.

Seating Arrangements: Keeping Kids Content

Strategic seating can enhance everyone's experience. Children aged 7 to 14 might enjoy sitting together at a designated kids' table, fostering a sense of camaraderie. For younger children, a separate area with childcare services can provide a safe and entertaining environment, allowing parents to relax and enjoy the celebration.​

Entertainment and Activities

Keeping children engaged is key to a smooth event. Consider setting up a "Kids' Club" with supervised activities like arts and crafts, games, or age-appropriate movies. For a more elaborate setup, hiring entertainers such as magicians or balloon artists can add a special touch. Tailor the activities to the children's ages and interests to ensure they have a memorable time.​

Including Caretakers

If parents prefer to bring a familiar caretaker for their child, accommodating this request can be a generous gesture. Include the caretaker in your headcount, provide appropriate seating, and ensure they're accounted for in meal planning. However, if budget or space constraints exist, it's acceptable to set boundaries while communicating them respectfully.​

Final Thoughts

Ultimately, your wedding day should reflect your vision and comfort level. Whether you choose to include children or not, clear communication and thoughtful planning will help create a joyous occasion for all. Remember, it's your celebration—design it in a way that brings you happiness and peace of mind.